So, what should I do to experience Devi? You don’t have to do anything. If there is not much of you, you will feel the presence of what is not you. If there is too much of you, you won’t feel anything anywhere. Not just here, anywhere. Devi is difficult to miss. If your vision is normal, we could write ‘A-B-C’ in big letters and you could read it. Right now, Devi is like that. She is for people who won’t get anything else – Big Bhairavi – you cannot miss her. It is very simple and easy. But most people are like this – they have not even felt their breath themselves. So for such people, if your heart is beating – dubu, dubu – if you cannot even feel this, how can you feel anything else?
There are people who have not felt their heartbeat, there are people who have not felt their own breath, there are people who cannot see the full moon. If you don’t notice a mosquito biting, your heart beating, your breathing…if you don’t notice how food behaves within you, how will you notice Devi? Fifty finger marks should fall on your face. If you want, we can also do that. I am not joking. We can do it, but it will hurt. There are a few things which have manifested in some people’s lives with Bhairavi which are very strange and, probably, they would not want to talk about it, so I will leave that alone, but things have happened. But the problem with most people is – they are already imagining something.
Don’t imagine anything. Imagination is not good for experience. If you think imagination is a substitute for your experience, it is a stupid way to live. Imagination will feel pleasant for some time – if it goes out of control, you will go nuts. Experience is different. Experience transforms life. With imagination, you can go to heaven in two minutes and come back and you are in the same place – a little depressed because you are back. Not that kind. Real life experience. Physically manifest experience. It is very much possible.
So…devotion. It is not because you are singing for Devi or loving Her that She will appear. She is always there. It is just that with devotion, you are trying to wear yourself down. Who you are is becoming less and less as your devotion overflows. She doesn’t care whether you are devoted or not. Your devotion has nothing to do with Her. Your devotion has something to do with you. If you are absolutely in devotion, nothing of you will be left. If nothing of you is left, She will be as strong and real as the morning sunlight. The only thing is, for you to feel it, you must be empty. How empty you are, that strongly you will feel it.
Your devotion is not about Devi; your devotion is about dissolving yourself. But without Her, you cannot be devout. You need something; you need somebody to be devout, so you can use Her. If you are in love with somebody or something, it is like this…If you see a cloud, Oh, it looks like Bhairavi! If you see a stone, It looks like Bhairavi! For devotees of Shiva, if you show them anything, they will say, Oh, it looks like a lingam! See that cloud? It looks like a lingam. Do you see? Do you see? It may sound stupid to you – it is stupid on one level, but it is a fantastic device. In everything, if you see that, now you don’t see yourself anywhere.
So, is this not stupid? An idea that works, do you call it stupid or smart? It works, that’s all. All devices are to be used, not to be analyzed. It is not for analysis, it is for use. If you use it, it works. If you analyze, what is there in it? If I analyze you, what the hell is there within you? There is really nothing. Isn’t it?
Posts
