Breaking the Cycle - Sadhguru

Questioner : I'm always doing practices but still, something within me is not breaking down. I'm making the same mistakes again and again. How to break that ?

Sadhguru : So you want to break down certain limitations and go beyond them. You need to understand, the karmic structure in every human being is essentially cyclical. When we say it is a cycle, it is not from lifetime to lifetime alone. If you are observant enough you will see, outside events generally repeat themselves in cycles of 12 to 15 years. If you observe much more closely, you will see, within a years time, these same patterns are happening many times over. If you observe, very very closely, even within a day, the same cycles are happening many times over. These 40 minutes cycles are called galige in Kannada. So, the karmic cycle actually takes force every 40 minutes. Every 40 minutes you have the oppurtunity to break it. If you are not observant, it may take a cycle of 12 years for you to notice that there is a certain pattern to your life. If you make yourself, more and more concious, you will see, every 40 minutes the same cycle is happening. It is very important to see this. If you see that your life is simply a repetitive foolish cycle, that every 40 minutes you are doing the same cycle over and over again, it just takes two days to realize this is no good. If you see the cycles once in a lifetime, it will take a few lifetimes to see this is no good.

It all depends on how concious you are. The more concious you become, the more you see living in an unconcious cycle is no good. So, every 40 minutes, you have an opportunity to become concious of it and to break the cycle. You want to break the present walls and go away. Do you have your wife's permission? You need to take permission because you took vows together (Laughs). But unfortunately, certain things in life do not happen with permission. Unless people are concious enough to see arrangements only as temporary and unless they are willing to look at life beyond that and take the arrangements to different levels as necessary, then the only choice becomes either to give up the process of growth or to break the arrangements. Both will be cruel. One will be cruel to you; another will be cruel to people around you. If you want to grow taking people along with you, it takes much more effort, much more conciousness, much more dedication, much more balance, much more sadhana than walking alone. I would say that a Brahmachari needs much less sadhana than people who want to live in family situation and still want to go; because they have taken on a bigger challenge in their life; a much bigger challenge. You will find walking alone to Kailash difficult. If you have to take four people on your shoulders and walk, it will take tremendous strenght.

So, If you go with your whole family to the base of the mountain, the only thing that will happen is, you will look at the mountain and you will shiver, because you look at your wife, you look at your child - "How to take all these people and go up?" Then you will become cautious. Caution and cowardice are not two different things. When someone else does it, it is cowardice. When you do it, it is caution. So, you will become cautious and do a more practical thing; you will have a picnic at the foothills. You will never attempt to climb the peak, because you are cautious, sensible and practical; all the nice things that make life sane. That is why we Built the Isha Yoga Centre at the foothills, so that you can come and have a picnic. Your little children, your wife, your grandmother and your mother-in-law, they are all there, you cannot just leave them and walk away. So, as a responsible, cautious, practical man, you will naturally choose to have a picnic at the foothills.

Once it happened. At a family dinner, Shankaran Pillai announced that he is going to get married. It was a large family dinner and all of them asked, "Who? Who are you going to marry?" Shankaran Pillai said "Our neighbour Lucy. I'm going to marry her." The father said "What? You'll marry Lucy? She has no inheritance. We don't know who her father is." The mother said, "What? You'll marry Lucy? She doesn't even have her own house." The aunt said, "What? You're going to marry Lucy? Look at her make up; she looks like a street women." The little nephew is not to be left out; he said, "What, you're going to marry Lucy? She knows nothing about football." Shankaran Pillai said, "Yes. But I'm going to marry Lucy because there is one big advantage." All of them asked, "What?" Shankaran Pillai replied, "Well, she has no family."

There are three ways to approach the spiritual process. One way is, slowly, by doing the right things through a few life times, you will get there. Another way is, you remain in your present circumstances, do the best you can do, keep yourself open, keep yourself focused and make yourself available to the process. In the last moment of your life, we will see that it happens. Another way is, that you want to know something now. You want to break your limitation now and go beyond; you want to know life beyond its limitation now. Then you should not be concerned about what is happening around you. You should not be concerned about it because many things will happen that nobody will approve. Society will not approve, people will not approve, your family will not approve since they related to you because you were one kind of person. If you become another kind, they will not be able to relate to you anymore.

Let us say you got married to somebody. They married you because you were certain kind of person. If you become another kind, maybe it is a beautiful kind but a different kind, you are suddenly an alien. They cannot live with you unless they have the wisdom and sense to see you as a great possibility, that "My partner has gone ahead. It is wonderful to have somebody ahead of me." If that much sense is there, fine, but if that much sense comes, then the relationship has to transform itself. It can be no more what it was; it has to become something else. Once you recognise that someone is way ahead of you, that relationship cannot be husband and wife, mother and son, , this and that, it will become something else. So, in some way, whatever you used to value will be broken, either physically broken and gone away, or you will be living in the same space, but still it will change. How many people are ready for that?

So, the other two options are better for a lot of people, that you do the right things, be available to your Guru, and when the last moment comes, he will take care of it. Or, you are not even willing to be available but you are willing to do a few little things; practice somekind of nourishement for yourself so that somewhere in the future, something will happen. I do not wish that for you. Either you must break your limitations now or atleast in the moment of death it must happen. I am not a patient person. I am not somebody who practices patience. I practiced impatience for lifetimes. Patience and I won't go together. People generally see me as an extremely patient person - but I am not. My acceptance is seen as patience, but I am not patient. I am a terribly a impatient person. I want everything on fast forward. I don't like anyhthing moving slowly. I would like the earth to spin a little faster so that your growth is hastened. Why should it take 24 hours ?

So, if you want to break your limitations and you have your wife's permission, there are ways to do it. You just come. Most people do not break without activity. Very few can sit here and simply dissolve themselves. The rest have to be broken. It takes physical, mental activity for them to break themselves. Or you leave yourself in my hands; I will break you very easily. Do you know what it means to leave yourself totally in my hands? If I say "sit", you sit. If I say "stand", you stand. Now, if I say "close your eyes", you want to check if everybody is closing them first and then you close your eyes - that won't work. You will follow instructions right now only if you feel the instructions are reasonable. When I give you an unreasonable instructions, only then you will know who you are. Till now, I have been very reasonable. Sometimes, I get very unreasonable. When I get unreasonable, I see most people fail. There is only a handful of people who are willing to take unreasonable instructions and simply go on without a single thought in their mind as to why it is so. This is not just for some sadistic pleasure to make you do something; it is because essentially, your limitations are created by your own mind; nothing else.

Between you and the ultimate, there is nothing else but yourself. You think some other mountain is standing between you and the Ultimate? - Just your own mental structure. If you have to break that, we have to do something in reverse. This is a simple thing you can do; team up with somebody you don't like. Spend time with that person; very lovingly, joyfully. A lot of things will break. But you always team up with somebody you like - that is not good for you. Get married to somebody that you hate - a lot of limitations will break.

If you choose something that you like, it strenghtens your personality. Learn to do things that you don't like, be with people that you don't like, and still live your life sensibily, lovingly, joyfully. Everything will break.