Friday, October 15, 2010

Is there a difference between looking good,feeling good and being good ?

There are three traits in human consciousness. Looking good, feeling good and being good. The most important of these traits is ‘being good’. Many people value ‘feeling-good’. However, if “feeling good” is not anchored on being good, then people get into drugs…….. Drugs temporarily make you feel good, but are not good for your well-being.

People also value looking good more. Impressing another is or primary importance. For them, looking good, physically and psychologically is more important than feeling good and being good. There is nothing wrong in looking good, as long as it is based on being good. More often, people want their image to be appreciated to feed their ego. Glamour is food for their ego; it decorates your ‘looking good’ pattern. Hence, glamour is of a greater appeal.

Questioner : Why is ‘looking good’ wrong ?

Swami : It is not a question of right or wrong. There exists a deeper meaning to it.

Reflect on this real incident.

A young girl from an orthodox Indian family became a widow at the age of 20. She expressed to me in one of my workshops that she was feeling lonely. I asked her why she could not remarry. She replied that she ccame from an orthodox family and feared what people would say if she were to get married again. I asked her as to what people were talking about her right then. She replied that they felt that she was a good woman. However, I asked her, if she was feeling-good. In the eyes of the people, she was looking-good but was not feeling good.

People sacrifice “feeling-good” and “being-good” for the sake of “looking-good”. By not remarrying, she was not being-good to her self. When looking-good is not based on being-good, then life becomes a mess. The world runs on the illusion of looking-good. If you do not look good, you will not survive this rat race, little realizing that even if you win, you continue to be a rat. Are people happy in spite of being successful ? Why is it that many successful people are still miserable? The reason being that they do not know the art of being happy. A study done on happy people showed that happy people showed that happy people were good finders. They always seek and find something good even in the bad.

Use the image of looking-good but do not be used by the image of looking-good. Just as you wear a dress, you are not the dress; so you are not the image. To be happy, be free from any image of yourself. Be empty of image, empty of thoughts, empty of conclusions. This inner emptiness is joy. This is a new way of looking.

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